Looking Forward to Change

Change is a funny thing.  All of the emotions you experience while you anticipate a change make for anxiety, nervousness, excitement, doubt, and any other feeling under the sun that you could possibly think of.  For me, I embrace change.  I love it actually.  I get bored very easy, so if I don't have some change every now and then, I become very....blah.

So, I know what you're thinking.  Colleen...you have a full time job, you have three kids, a boyfriend, a family, friends!  How can your life ever be "consistent"!  Well, you are kind of right there.  Sure, things change from day to day - who's being the disruptive kid, who wants to have fun, what activities we have to do, etc.  But it is still the same thing everyday, all day.  Wake up, make breakfast, send kids to school, go to work, come home from work, pick kids up from school, do homework, make dinner, go to a game or practice, come home, feed children, send them to the shower, put them in bed, go to bed.  Repeat.  The monotony.  It's agonizing!

Not only is the repetitiveness like an enclosed grave on Earth, doing it alone just flat out sucks.  Tommy is working overtime, or out of town, or having to stay home with the girls while I take Austyn to practice or whatever the story may be for the day.  We are never together.  We hardly get to see each other, and when we do, its pretty much in passing on the way out the door to work or on the way into snooze land.  God bless the strength we've been given to remain exasperatingly in love during a time like this, but it really is an empty feeling when you have no one to share your life with...no matter how boring it may be.

Change is on the horizon though, and I could not be more than ecstatic for it to arrive.  Tommy is expected to be home, on time, everyday, beginning next week (hopefully for an extended period of time!).  I can not wait to have him there to help me from losing my mind...or patience (which let's just be honest here, I was not blessed in that department, so there is very little of it to begin with!).  I am so excited for the change of coming home and rambling about nonsense from my day with an adult, having help getting the kids taken care of, and most importantly, just getting to spend some time with the person that I do all of this for.  So, here's to hoping the blah is soon replaced by giggles and laughter; after all that really is the best medicine.